“And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.”
My Notes
What Does 2 Samuel 13:22 Mean?
"And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar." After Amnon rapes Tamar, Absalom says nothing to him — no confrontation, no rebuke, no forgiveness, no dialogue of any kind. The silence is deliberate and sinister: Absalom is planning. His hatred doesn't express itself in words. It buries itself in silence and waits for two years before he murders Amnon.
The phrase "neither good nor bad" describes a terrifying emotional flatline — a person so consumed by rage that they've achieved perfect external composure while planning execution internally. Absalom's silence is more dangerous than any outburst would have been.
Reflection Questions
- 1.Where is silence in your life concealing something that needs to be addressed?
- 2.How does David's failure to act create the conditions for Absalom's violence?
- 3.What injustice in your family or community is festering because no one has the courage to confront it?
- 4.How do you distinguish between healthy silence (processing) and dangerous silence (planning)?
Devotional
Neither good nor bad. Absalom said nothing to Amnon. Not a rebuke. Not a question. Not a threat. Nothing. For two years. The silence was the loudest thing in the room.
Absalom's sister Tamar was raped by their half-brother Amnon. And David — their father, the king — did nothing. He was angry (v. 21) but took no action. The king who conquered nations couldn't confront his own son. And into that vacuum of failed fatherhood, Absalom's hatred grew.
The silence is the warning sign. When someone stops talking to the person who wronged them — not in healing withdrawal but in cold, calculated distance — something is building beneath the surface. Absalom didn't rage. Didn't confront. Didn't process. He went quiet. And the quieter he got, the more deadly his plan became.
Two years of silence. Two years of sitting across from Amnon at family meals. Two years of watching the man who destroyed his sister walk free because their father was too weak to act. And then Absalom throws a party, gets Amnon drunk, and has his servants kill him.
The tragedy isn't just the violence. It's the chain: David's failure to act forced Absalom to act. The father's weakness produced the son's wrath. Justice delayed became vengeance unleashed. And a family that had survived Goliath and Saul was torn apart by something it could have addressed with one honest, painful conversation.
Silence that conceals hatred is more dangerous than any spoken rage. The person who says nothing might be planning everything.
Commentary
Trusted original commentary from respected historical Bible scholars and theologians.
And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad,.... That is, said nothing at all to him about the rape of…
What Solomon says of the beginning of strife is as true of the beginning of all sin, it is as the letting forth of…
neither good nor bad He made no allusion whatever to the matter, in order to quiet Amnon's suspicions. For the phrase…
Cross References
Related passages throughout Scripture