“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
My Notes
What Does Proverbs 22:6 Mean?
Solomon offers a proverb about parenting that has been beloved and debated for centuries. "Train up" in Hebrew (chanak) means to dedicate, to initiate — the same word used for dedicating a new house or temple. It carries the sense of launching someone into their intended purpose.
"In the way he should go" is more literally "according to his way" — which some scholars read as "according to the child's individual nature." If that reading is correct, Solomon isn't prescribing a one-size-fits-all approach. He's saying: study your child, understand their bent, and train them accordingly.
The promise — "when he is old, he will not depart from it" — is wisdom literature, not a guarantee. Proverbs speaks in general principles, not absolute promises. The principle is that early formation is powerful and tends to hold. It's not a contract that eliminates a child's agency.
This verse has brought both comfort and pain to parents — comfort to those investing in their children's formation, and pain to those whose children have chosen differently despite faithful parenting. The genre matters: this is wisdom, not prophecy.
Reflection Questions
- 1.How does reading 'the way he should go' as 'according to his nature' change how you think about parenting?
- 2.If this is a principle rather than a guarantee, how do you hold it when a child makes different choices?
- 3.What was planted in you during childhood that has lasted? What has changed?
- 4.What's the difference between training a child and controlling a child?
Devotional
If you're a parent, this verse probably lands with weight. Train up a child in the way he should go. The responsibility feels enormous — and it is. But the verse might be gentler than you think.
"According to his way" suggests that good parenting isn't about forcing every child down the same path. It's about paying attention to who this specific child actually is — their temperament, their gifts, their wiring — and shaping the training to fit them.
That's not a formula. It's a relationship. It requires knowing your child, not just managing them.
And the promise — "when he is old, he will not depart from it" — is a principle, not a guarantee. If your child has walked away from what you taught them, this verse isn't an indictment of your parenting. Proverbs describes patterns, not destinies. Your child's choices are their own.
But the principle holds: what is planted early tends to take root. The conversations, the prayers, the way you live your own faith in front of them — that foundation matters. Even when it doesn't look like it.
Your job isn't to control the outcome. It's to be faithful in the formation.
Commentary
Trusted original commentary from respected historical Bible scholars and theologians.
Train up a child in the way he should go,.... As Abraham trained up his children, and those born in his house, in the…
Train - Initiate, and so, educate. The way he should go - Or, according to the tenor of his way, i. e., the path…
Here is, 1. A great duty enjoined, particularly to those that are the parents and instructors of children, in order to…
in the way he should go Lit. according to his way. The injunction contemplates not only the broad principles of…
Cross References
Related passages throughout Scripture